"If Truth is beauty, how come no one gets their hair done at the library?" --Lily Tomlin
When I was 6 years old I dreamed of having long, luscious, golden hair--just like a Barbie doll. I begged and pleaded till mom bought me a blonde wig for Christmas. Night and day, I paraded around the house in that thing, usually with a hat on---convinced that it looked totally realistic. Like I just went to sleep one night and *poof* the next morning--my hair had been transformed! Oh if it was only that easy...
Hair has always been a REALLY big deal to me. Of course I'm speaking figuratively here, but as evidenced by the pictures, sometimes quite literally--
HUGE! Seriously, Al Gore's next documentary could be about how I single handedly destroyed the ozone layer with my hairspray habit. Perhaps it has something to do with my southern roots, being born in Dallas, Texas and all. Or maybe it's because I've spent half my life looking for something to "balance out my hips"--MAN I miss those ginormous 80's shoulder pads! All I know is that since I was a wee lass, the state of my hair has been inexorably intertwined with my happiness. In my younger, less mature days, I cancelled dinner dates, called in sick, skipped parties--even church when I had a bad hair day. OKAY, OKAY-- I'm shallow, but do I at least get points for honesty????
HUGE! Seriously, Al Gore's next documentary could be about how I single handedly destroyed the ozone layer with my hairspray habit. Perhaps it has something to do with my southern roots, being born in Dallas, Texas and all. Or maybe it's because I've spent half my life looking for something to "balance out my hips"--MAN I miss those ginormous 80's shoulder pads! All I know is that since I was a wee lass, the state of my hair has been inexorably intertwined with my happiness. In my younger, less mature days, I cancelled dinner dates, called in sick, skipped parties--even church when I had a bad hair day. OKAY, OKAY-- I'm shallow, but do I at least get points for honesty????
And oh the abuse I have heaped upon my poor head down through the years! I've spent the better part of half a century trying to cut, curl, straighten, tease and spray my hair into submission.
The cycle goes like this:
Also sprinkled in there have been various color experiments, some successful, some-- not so much.
Right now I'm in the throes of remorse and despair and I decided it might alleviate the gloom if I revisited some of of my former hair dos and don'ts as a reminder that eventually, it grows out.
So--now that I've been all brave and shown you my WORST hair days, jump on out there with me. Go through your old pics find your most humiliating most unique hair look and send it to me. Guys too, come on, don't deprive us the opportunity to see those GLORIOUS mullet photos!!! I'll post them and then the girls and I will pick a--um--winner. We'll even send you a PRIZE! What kind of prize you ask? Well DUH, something fabulous from the Rusk hair product line.
Send your photos to me at: teegeesykes@gmail.com
I wake up look in the mirror and decide I would look FABULOUS with long hair.
Proceed to let hair grow and grow, despite said process getting on my last nerve.
I wake up one morning and decide I CAN NOT LIVE ANOTHER DAY without a haircut.
Haircut!!!
Remorse and Despair.
Proceed to let hair grow and grow, despite said process getting on my last nerve.
I wake up one morning and decide I CAN NOT LIVE ANOTHER DAY without a haircut.
Haircut!!!
Remorse and Despair.
Also sprinkled in there have been various color experiments, some successful, some-- not so much.
Right now I'm in the throes of remorse and despair and I decided it might alleviate the gloom if I revisited some of of my former hair dos and don'ts as a reminder that eventually, it grows out.
So--now that I've been all brave and shown you my WORST hair days, jump on out there with me. Go through your old pics find your most humiliating most unique hair look and send it to me. Guys too, come on, don't deprive us the opportunity to see those GLORIOUS mullet photos!!! I'll post them and then the girls and I will pick a--um--winner. We'll even send you a PRIZE! What kind of prize you ask? Well DUH, something fabulous from the Rusk hair product line.
Send your photos to me at: teegeesykes@gmail.com
"If you don't like Tanya's hair, stick around--it's bound to change." -- my dad
DEAR MOM: WHY?
WINGS OVER AMERICA
HAD TO THROW IN ONE NON HIDEOUS ONE
OKAY-- TWO
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A BANANA WITH A CEREAL BOWL?
ALY CALLS THIS MY "BLONDEREXIA" PHASE
WOW, JUST WOW.
NOT EVEN SURE HOW I DID THIS!!!
I THINK THERE'S EVEN A BANANA CLIP IN THE BACK
CLEARED FOR TAKEOFF...
DEFYING GRAVITY
And I thought some of my hair colors were unique.
ReplyDeleteLove it!
ReplyDeleteI wanted to have blonde barbie hair too - except my hair is nearly black. In 7th grade, this hair stylist told me to spray a little peroxide in it once a week and I could lighten my hair easily. Well, to a 13 year old, that translated to daily peroxide treatments. I had a perm, peroxided hair, and big bangs. I can't believe it didn't all fall out! It was hideous. And no, I'm not posting a picture!
ReplyDeleteTanya,
ReplyDeleteSuch a funny post. I love the honesty and humor and all women can relate to "hair stories" I still love my scrunchies. Shhh..
I miss those days of big hair, too!
ReplyDeleteEvery now and then I get a bit overzealous with the hairspray and have terrible flashbacks of my high school bathroom and the peer pressure I felt to use Aqua Net.
I think I have PTHD...Post Traumatic Hair Disorder.
Isn't it funny how we women can relate when it comes to hair?
:)
good GRIEF. no wonder your daughter wants to fix the world, 'one hairdo at a time'!
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! I have photos that look just like these. They make my children laugh out loud!
ReplyDelete